Post by HeartBurn Kid on Jun 29, 2004 0:13:30 GMT -5
(Fade in in a kitchen. Two 10-year-old boys are putting a pot of macaroni and cheese on the stove.)
Boy 1: I don't think we should use the stove by ourselves.
Boy 2: Will you relax, you wimp? What can go wrong?
(Boy 2 turns on the stove, and his sleeve catches on fire.)
Boy 2: AAAAAAAH!
Boy 1: Ohgodohgodwhatdoido?
(Safe Man enters. He's dressed in shorts, a t-shirt, a reflective crossing guard vest, a beach towel tied as a cape, and wearing yellow caution tape as a headband).
Boy 1: Wow, it's Safe Man!
Boy 2: AAAAAAAAAAH!
SM: Boys, you should never play with the stove!
Boy 1: Yeah, but what do we do now?
Boy 2: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! BURNING!
SM: Well, first, your parents should always keep a fully-charged fire extinguisher, and you should know where it is! Do you?
Boy 1: Yeah.
(Boy 1 goes under the sink and pulls out a fire extinguisher.)
Boy 2: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
SM: Good! Now pull the pin, point the hose at his arm, and pull the trigger!
(Boy 1 does so, and the fire goes out.)
Boys (in unison): Thanks, Safe Man!
Boy 2: But what if we don't have a fire extinguisher.
SM: Well, I'm glad you asked, Timmy...
Boy 2: Jimmy.
SM: Whatever. Let me demonstrate. Here. (hands Jimmy a lighter) Light my cape on fire.
(Jimmy does so)
SM: OK, so what you do, is Stop... Drop... and Roll!
(Safe Man drops to the ground and rolls around, then gets up)
SM: TA-DA! Now, I hope you boys learned something today...
Jimmy: But Safe Man...
SM: No, no need to thank me, it's all in a day's work for the Safety Knight!
Jimmy: But...
SM: Wait... my Safety Sense is tingling...
Jimmy: YOU'RE STILL ON FIRE, YOU MORON!
SM: (just noticing his cape has burst into flames again) AHHHHHHHHHHHH! (runs off)
(Fade out)
Boy 1: I don't think we should use the stove by ourselves.
Boy 2: Will you relax, you wimp? What can go wrong?
(Boy 2 turns on the stove, and his sleeve catches on fire.)
Boy 2: AAAAAAAH!
Boy 1: Ohgodohgodwhatdoido?
(Safe Man enters. He's dressed in shorts, a t-shirt, a reflective crossing guard vest, a beach towel tied as a cape, and wearing yellow caution tape as a headband).
Boy 1: Wow, it's Safe Man!
Boy 2: AAAAAAAAAAH!
SM: Boys, you should never play with the stove!
Boy 1: Yeah, but what do we do now?
Boy 2: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! BURNING!
SM: Well, first, your parents should always keep a fully-charged fire extinguisher, and you should know where it is! Do you?
Boy 1: Yeah.
(Boy 1 goes under the sink and pulls out a fire extinguisher.)
Boy 2: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
SM: Good! Now pull the pin, point the hose at his arm, and pull the trigger!
(Boy 1 does so, and the fire goes out.)
Boys (in unison): Thanks, Safe Man!
Boy 2: But what if we don't have a fire extinguisher.
SM: Well, I'm glad you asked, Timmy...
Boy 2: Jimmy.
SM: Whatever. Let me demonstrate. Here. (hands Jimmy a lighter) Light my cape on fire.
(Jimmy does so)
SM: OK, so what you do, is Stop... Drop... and Roll!
(Safe Man drops to the ground and rolls around, then gets up)
SM: TA-DA! Now, I hope you boys learned something today...
Jimmy: But Safe Man...
SM: No, no need to thank me, it's all in a day's work for the Safety Knight!
Jimmy: But...
SM: Wait... my Safety Sense is tingling...
Jimmy: YOU'RE STILL ON FIRE, YOU MORON!
SM: (just noticing his cape has burst into flames again) AHHHHHHHHHHHH! (runs off)
(Fade out)
SAFE MAN
COMING SOON TO wOw
SAFETY FIRST!
COMING SOON TO wOw
SAFETY FIRST!
